Tuesday, March 6, 2012

To be affectionate

The more I continue to observe and allow myself to be, the more I believe life is carefully weaved to create beautiful interactions between people. We meet each stranger, each lover and each enemy for a reason; a relationship between two people is understandably complex yet the interconnectedness in this universe is alarmingly simple.

I bring the idea of connections and perfect timing for a reason. At a time of drastic emotional changes and self-growth, I have had the opportunity to create closeness between old friendships and create distance between those who are of no importance. And through another turning point in my life, I have met a man. A man who once intimidated me turned out to be the perfect man to teach me lessons in intimacy. At a time when a group of the closest people need my emotional support most, he is--simultaneously--showing me how to outwardly express my love for them. He is leading me in a foreign dance; he takes two steps as I follow with one.
He is patient and persistent.
He is kind yet forceful but never cruel and distant.

I have been going through my young adult life with very few lessons in love and relationships. I kept experiencing cycles of hurt and fear. However, it is not too late and I suppose it is finally time for me to learn this hard lesson. But, ironically, it is not difficult at all. In fact, it is so pure, so innocent and so calming, I realized fear was what fueled the negative emotions I marked as love. There is no love in fear and I am learning that now. So here I am, witnessing what it is like to show affection and to receive it whole-heartedly.


His collection of useful clutter.

Unfinished ceiling and a leaf


Note: When I talk about love, I am not talking about a love between two partners. In fact, I know I am nowhere near love. However, I am learning how to love a human being through a dating scenario. And I am content. 

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