Monday, May 28, 2012



Sometimes, I find myself given a situation which tears my heart apart as it pushes me to question my own morale. Today I was blessed with a present but given my current circumstances I cannot enjoy this gift for too long. I will have to make the tough decision of parting with you, my babe. I understand the controversy over such a delicate matter but I cannot possibly bring you into a world in which I cannot give the very best to you. As heart wrenching as it is for me, I must go through with it. I was careless and I am no more intelligent than you. Babe, I know you'll forgive me for not carrying through with my responsibility.

For the next week, I will cherish this special experience and love my body as much as I can. I know you are listening and you can understand what it means for me to leave you babe. Just know you'll always be my first. It has only been a few weeks but I already feel attached to you. I can sense your presence from within and how precious you are to me. It is an unfortunate event. Some may judge me for it but I do hope, babe, that you understand me.

Always and forever,


Wednesday, May 9, 2012

I Once Made a Man Cry

I once made a man cry. It was near midnight and the dim streetlights made his tears glisten. He stared at me with such intensity as he spoke, lips trembling. People passed, unaware (or ignorant) of the way my words hit him. We sat side by side, still, on the cement planter box. My arms rose, only to find themselves embraced around my own body: I had to give myself the love I deserve. There was something about the midnight air which made my thoughts blur. The cold stirred all sorts of selfish emotions. Or maybe it was the alcohol. He spoke of the way I pushed him away and how it worked so effectively; he spoke of the resistance I create when we are together; he spoke of the way he adored me. I listened in silence. My response was a laugh. It was the laugh that crawled out of your throat slowly because nothing else seemed any more appropriate. It was the uncontrollable laugh which traveled to his ears and forcefully pushed down his throat until he could no longer breathe properly. It was a lethal nervous laugh.

I once made a man cry.

No, my truth made a man cry.